I know I am loved

This online community we have here as always been an extra source of love for me. It might be an email or a post on my blog or maybe a letter in the mail, I have known I am loved.

Today I got a package from Londa. Some of you may know her. She is an extremely loving woman. She sent me a dream catcher. It is so beautiful I just love it. Even though you probably wont see this, Thank you Londa.

yay? no.

Going into my last two weeks of the quarter. It seems to be that I am getting sick. AGAIN. >_< I am getting so tired of being tired. I am getting sick of being sick. I am stressed about being stressed. Do you understand my English? I keep spinning as fast as I can to keep up with the world but all I get is motion sickness.

SRD-
Just write your dam paper, finish your dam project and try and get some dam sleep. OH and go buy some dam cold medicine, who gives a crap that its you cant really afford it.
-SRD

dont look at me like that

a list of things on my mind:
-Nonna's low o2 causing her to collapse yesterday
-My mom's mental state after such event
-Only sleeping an hour last night
-My parents fight
-Phone call from dad?
-My paper that I have not started yet (due Wednesday)
-My project that I have not gotten film back for yet (also due Wednesday)
-2 weeks left in the quarter???????!!!!!!!!!!
-My stomach and neck

ok thats all i got right now

Trying something new

All this blog talk has gotten me thinking about how I really like to write. Not normal writing, but poems. A few of you may know this already or have picked up on it, its not important. I have been writing for myself in a word document for about a year now. About 45 typed pages of poems. I think I want to share them. I am going to try it out. In a new blog but I am not going to link it yet on my main blog and I would hope that you all don't link to it yet. I am not sure if I am ready to share some of these so I will go slowly. I trust you all enough so here is the link:

http://poemmylife.blogspot.com/

My poems are my deepest thoughts. There is nothing more but them.

yesterday

My yesterday went well so I figured I would post about that instead about my today. I got to spend time with a friend I have not seen in a while. I got to have a small conversation with Nonna, who was very confused, but it did not matter because I got to hear her voice I have not hurd it in a very long time. Lastly I got a belated Birthday present from an out of town friend. Its not so much the present but the reminder that she cares that made me so happy. I was reminded yesterday that tomorrow can be ok.

*cough cough*

I am designing and helping with another friends blog. Also met him though the Alzheimer's Association. This friend has a lot of stuff to say, I should know he is my grandpa. Anyways please take a look at his blog. You wont be disapointed.

http://davescogitations.blogspot.com/

OH and read his first posts backwards, start down at the bottom post and read up. THANKS

new blogs for one and all

Change. Its bad and it is good. I reworked my blog and Gales today. Take a look at her's please Its prettier then mine! Anyways Change. They want to move Nonna to the 1st floor of the nursing home. They say there they are better equipped to deal with someone in her state. I don't quite like this idea. We have gotten used to the people on the 3ed floor. They know her, and in a way she knows them. Whats the point in changing all of that? Its not like I have a say in it. My mom and Aunt will make the choice for all of us. Then I will learn to deal with it. I just hope whatever happens is the best for Nonna.

Its something...

Maybe I just needed a break of a few days. I feel a bit better now. I know you all want an update on Nonna. She seems to have gotten back into a holding pattern. She has bad nights. Most every night, she gets angry to the point of hurting herself and the nurses. She wont use her bi-pap and she wont use the oxygen. The cant give her sedatives because that makes her unconscious. For now she gets a few good hours a day. When someone visits her is the extent of it. I wish I could be there for her and add to her few good hours. I know if I was there I could help. I think thats been really hard for me the past few days. I have been missing her so much that I am almost crawling out of my skin to get home. I came up with something though. Its not a lot but I figured out that Nonna does have a mailing address. So I am going to in the spirit of GLO start sending her letters. I don't think she will be able to read them. I am hoping that my large words might be able to be processed. Or maybe my name will trigger something? I put a dog sticker on the first one. She likes animals so maybe she can at least look at that. I just miss her so much some times. I think this might help me more then her.

thank you my friends for always being here.