I am here. I am feeling lost. School starts Monday and I am extremely nervous. I am afraid that it will be like it was last quarter when I could not focus on school and I just give up. I cant have another quarter like the last one. Then I will feel like there was no point in me even coming to college. That might be what I am really afraid of, that I will fail and then it will all have been for nothing.
My friends have been around a lot lately, and well I think I finally let out some of what I have been thinking. A friend asked me about my dad and I just could not help but tell the truth. I told him about how he does not help with Nonna. How he fights with my mom all the time. How he fights with me all the time. How he can only make things worse. I don't know if he wanted to know all he found out but now he does and I feel like I have given him a part of my soul or something. I don't tell these things to people lightly. I wish I never had to tell anyone what actually goes on in my house, but I fear I would explode if I did not.
More random things you might want to know. I got "layed off" from my job today. The class I was supposed to TA for got canceled and the teacher failed to tell me this until now. This is a pretty big problem for me, I will have to look for a new job now. Also I found out that I have 300 dollars worth of textbooks I need to buy for my classes this quarter. Thats a record for me. So no job but 300 dollars of textbooks to buy... plus I got my first bills this morning. The life of a college kid... The apartment looks nice though. I will take photos soon to post here. I guess thats all for now. Thanks guys- I am thinking of you.
Friday, August 31, 2007
Update
Subscribe to:
Post Comments (Atom)
3 comments:
Hey Stef - you have a lot of pressure! Hard to believe how much college costs. Your books cost more than my entire first year tuition and books.
I have 11 grandkids I hope to help through college.
Definitely try to hang in there on college. It is so much easier to do it now. I know this doesn't help much.
Keeping you in my thoughts and prayers.
i too am thinking about you. what about college loans? i know usually the interest rates are lower for college students.
hopefully once classes start you will will get into a grove.
hang in there!
Sweetie, don't worry about failing. Just do your best. The only failure is in never trying.
I hope you can get a loan or a grant to get those books paid for. I'm looking forward to apartment pictures. Stay strong and above all else, have some fun.
Post a Comment